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You’ve Got Fucking Problems, Anonymous.

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Ya think? What gave me away?

That I haven’t had a day off in two years, and I’m literally exhausted?

That I don’t have one red cent to my name anymore, and am filing bankruptcy because I burned through all my savings to take care of Mom?

That I’ve gained thirty pounds in the past two years because I drink two bottles of wine a day as the only way to relax in the evening?

That I can’t remember the last book I read cover to cover that wasn’t about Mom’s condition, or caregiving?

That the only entertainment I have is evening TV, but that I’m reducing my premium channels because I can’t afford them anymore?

That the only fun I have each week has been going to dinner with Mom and her wonderful friends, but that I have to stop doing that now, too, because of money?

That I’m broiling in an eighty-degree house at the beginning of summer in Florida because I’m trying to lower my electric bills?

Seriously. What gave me away?

It was my older brother who told me by text yesterday that I’ve got fucking problems. Yeah, and he’s one of the biggest.

You see, we bought the house Mom and I live in together. Before we became co-owners of a home, and before I became Mom’s caregiver, he and I had always had a good relationship. He was my big brother, and everything that goes along with that. He had been stepping in between trouble and me my whole life. Now he’s the trouble I can’t get out of the way of.

He lives far away and has absolutely no idea what I deal with every day, taking care of Mom. But he thinks he knows everything. He bosses me around, treats me like I’m a tenant in his house, yells at me, berates me for not doing everything exactly as he says I should, and basically treats me like a child/employee.

And my sister is no help, either. She has all the backbone of a squid, and will always cleave to the most powerful person in the room/family. My brother has the money, so in her eyes, that makes him the most powerful.

All of this is one of the reasons I started this blog. To get things off my chest, but also to try to use it as a way to get myself financially independent of my ass hat brother.


Shiny Happy People

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